


Just The Way You Are

by Anonymous



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Confessions, Fix It, Getting Together, M/M, Oneshot, Sharing a Bed, post It Chapter Two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:49:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24133117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: “If you knew...if you knew what went on in my head, the way I feel, the way I’ve always felt...you wouldn’t like me”“That’s not true...I’ve always liked you Richie...and I like you now...just the way you are”
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 2
Kudos: 90
Collections: Anonymous





	Just The Way You Are

Richie had spent a while in the shower back at the hotel, washing the dirt and shitty water off himself. His mind was wondering, he kept thinking about what happened back there, what he saw in the deadlights but he also kept thinking about what now? In a way he’s still lost Eddie, he knows it. Tomorrow they will all leave and Eddie will go back to Myra who looks like fucking Sonia Kaspbrak and god it gave Richie shivers. He doesn’t get to run off into the sunset with him because deep down he knows that he’s too scared to tell Eddie how he feels.

He’s too scared to talk about how he’s loved Eddie since he laid eyes on him, that Eddie was all he ever thought about, how he’s still all he thinks about. He’d do anything for him like fuck, if Eddie told him to jump in fucking fire he would. He knows that he needs to start learning to accept himself, to be who he wants to be but how can he do that when he can’t even tell the man he’s loved all his life that he loves him? In a way, the way he ran out the house holding Eddie by the wrist he wanted that, he just wanted to take Eddie by the hand and run out of Derry together, to the start of their lives. If he was honest he felt like he could cry again at the pain over everything he experienced today and the fact that he may never see Eddie again and his heart could not take it. 

He climbed out the shower, wrapping a towel around himself before looking in the mirror. Even while clean he felt like he looked like shit, stress seems to be taking a toll on him. He sighed as he turned away from the mirror and dried himself off before changing into a shirt and some boxer shorts and climbed into bed. His bed was better back at home but this would do for the night. The truth is he didn’t want to sleep, too much was on his mind, the events of today, his future, the future of the losers. Would they all stay together? Would they all keep in contact? He hopes so because without them he’s never felt so alone. Tucking the sheets under his chin he looked up at the ceiling in the dark bedroom before he heard a knock on his door.

He looked up with surprise before he was reaching to turn the lamp on and climb out of bed. We would be lying if he said he didn’t feel on edge about whoever was at the door given the circumstances but he knew Pennywise was gone, it can’t hurt him anymore. Slowly he walked over to the bedroom door before opening it to see who it was interrupting the sleep he was not getting. As he opened the door, Richie was surprised to see Eddie standing there, still wearing the clothes he wore down back at Neibolt, dirt and crap all over him.  
“Can I use your shower? I don’t really want to use mine because the smashed glass and blood everywhere” Muttered Eddie, looking a little awkward asking.  
“Y-Yeah sure” Responded Richie as he stepped aside for Eddie to enter the bedroom.

He watched as Eddie held the pile of clothes in his hands before opening his mouth as if to speak before closing it again.  
“Don’t make fun of me but that’s not all...can I stay here tonight?” He asked next taking Richie by surprise.  
“It’s just I kind of don’t want to be alone and I can’t stop thinking about the clown and fucking Bowers and-“  
“Hey it’s fine, you didn’t need to ask, course you can stay here” Responded Richie.  
“Thanks Rich” He said softly as Richie smiled back at him.

Eddie went to put his towel and clothes in the bathroom before he noticed Richie hugging himself as he sat back on the bed.  
“You not turned the heater on dumbass?” Said Eddie as he came back out the bathroom.  
“It’s broken” Muttered Richie in response, both looking over at the broken furnace before Eddie was going back into the bathroom to grab something from his clothes pile and throwing it towards him.

Richie caught it in his hands before looking to see it was a grey jacket. He shrugged his shoulders and he went to put his arms in each of the sleeves before zipping it up. It was a little tight on him but it was Eddie’s, it smelt like Eddie and he couldn’t help but feel this rush of warmth and happiness fill him.  
“Thanks but I think it’s a little small” Said Richie with amusement as he looked up at Eddie.  
“It suits you” Eddie responded with a smile before he was closing the bathroom door. Richie couldn’t help but smile as he played with the white strings on the jacket.

It was probably terrible but he couldn’t help but think about how Eddie was currently naked in the room next to him right now as he listened to the sound of the water running. He lay back down on the bed as he tried to clear his head of the not so innocent thoughts. He wished he could tell Eddie how he felt, so desperately he wanted to tell him but he was scared. In a way he wondered if Eddie even felt the same or would he politely reject him? It kind of made Richie anxious and sick thinking about it. He doesn’t know if he’d be able to handle the sickening pain of Eddie rejecting him.

He heard after some time the water turn off before the sound of footsteps and shuffling as Eddie was most likely towelling himself dry and getting dressed. Richie pushed himself back up into a sitting position as the bathroom door opened and out came Eddie. He wore some plain grey sweatpants and a burgundy long sleeve shirt while his hair now looked a little fluffed up. Richie couldn’t help but feel like his heart was doing little flips as he saw him, he just looked so cute! cute! cute!

He watched as Eddie climbed under the sheets, lying down while Richie stayed sat up. He couldn’t help but look at how little Eddie looked curled into the sheets as he lay on his side and tried to close his eyes obviously to sleep but Richie didn’t seem to get the memo. He wanted to reach out and brush his fingers through Eddie’s hair, he wanted to brush his fingers across Eddie’s cheek that weirdly healed like the scar on their hands after they defeated the clown. 

“You going to join me or are you going to keep staring dumbass?” mumbled Eddie, eyes still closed and knocking Richie out of his thoughts. Slowly he shuffled down on the bed until he was finally lying down on the bed with him, he lay on his back, one arm up resting behind his head as he turned his head to face Eddie. Slowly Eddie opened his eyes, his big bambi eyes that Richie calls them in his mind. Those fucking eyes had him whipped the moment he met Eddie and after all these years they still do.  
“You okay?” Asked Richie as Eddie shrugged his shoulders, brushing against the sheets.  
“I guess so given the circumstances...are you?” He asked in response.  
“Me? Yeah I’m fine! we killed a fucking clown, that shits over!” Exclaimed Richie trying to sound confident in his answer but the truth is he knew he wasn’t fine, he saw what happened in the deadlights and this might be the last time he sees Eddie. 

He watched as Eddie nodded his head, he knew that Eddie could see past his bullshit. He nervously swallowed before shuffling a little to get more comfortable in the bed.  
“Can I ask you something?”  
“Sure”  
“What did you see?” Asked Eddie causing Richie to furrow his eyebrows together.  
“What do you mean?”  
“Bev said she saw all of us die when she got caught in the deadlights...did you see anything?”  
Richie shook his head  
“Nah, I can’t really remember because shit happened so fast you know? You and your fancy javelin skills that I didn’t have time to see anything” he explained as Eddie’s eyes squinted a little, he could see through Richie’s bullshit.  
“Bullshit”  
“What do you mean bullshit?”  
“You’re lying, you saw something”  
“Look it doesn’t matter because it didn’t happen-“  
“So you did see something”  
“Eddie”  
“It’s just you pushed me away so quick when you came to and I’m just wondering how you could have seen it coming and-“  
“Eddie”  
“I know you’re keeping something from me and I-“  
“-I saw you die!” Said Richie as he raised his voice a little, Eddie’s eyes widening a little and Richie felt guilty for even raising his voice to him but Eddie kept pushing and pushing.  
“I saw you die” he whispered next as Eddie kept his eyes on him.

“I...I felt like I was living it, I thought it was real...you were above me telling me how you think you’ve killed it and then out of nowhere it’s fucking leg impaled you” he started as he looked at Eddie. Eddie was silent as he kept his eyes on him, most likely freaking out at what he was hearing but he stayed quiet, waiting for Richie to continue.  
“By the time we killed the fucker you were gone and I-I felt sick like my fucking guts were in my mouth and I just wanted to die down there with you, the place was coming down and they all dragged me away from you while I was screaming out for you” Richie could see tears filling up in Eddie’s eyes or was it his own eyes welling up?  
“It felt so real because everything else after happened, the quarry, us walking back and fuck even us looking in the window and seeing ourselves all of it...I starting hearing your voice again and that’s when I came to and realised what was about to happen, that’s why I was so quick to push you away” finished Richie and he felt like he had a lump in his throat, Eddie seemed to have clutched onto the bedsheets tighter and nervously swallowed.

“Holy shit” he muttered as Richie hummed in response, too worried to say anything else in case he really starts to breakdown and cry.  
“Did you see anyone else or?” Asked Eddie as Richie shook his head and shuffled to lie on his side, turning to completely face Eddie.  
“I just know back there I wanted to die too I...my mind just went back to everything me and you have been through, the first time I met you and how I’d never see you again” Richie nervously swallowed again before asking the next question that he had been fearing since coming back to the shitty hotel.

“We’re gonna see each other again after this right?” He asked, voice breaking a little and Richie could see the sadness in Eddie’s eyes.  
“Of course we are, you don’t need to even ask that Rich of course we’ll see each other again” Said Eddie, before he sighed.  
“I just don’t know what happens next after this” he muttered as Richie shrugged.

“Go home? Back to your mom? Oh sorry wife” teased Richie as Eddie shook his head.  
“Dickhead” muttered Eddie and Richie couldn’t help but grin even though it was the truth both the fact that Eddie basically married his mom and that he’ll be going back to her.  
“I’m getting a divorce” he admitted next causing Richie’s eyes to widen and his eyebrows to raise up with surprise, now that he notices...Eddie doesn’t have his ring on.  
“You serious?” He asked as Eddie hummed in response.  
“Spent hours on the phone with her before coming in here. Back there opened my eyes to a lot of things Rich...made me see things that I’ve been completely blind to that I didn’t see it until now, put things into perspective I guess” Explained Eddie and Richie felt like his heart was pounding in his chest at what Eddie was saying. He’s just talking about how he’s been in a unhappy marriage right? He wasn’t talking about him?

Should he tell him? He can’t tell him right? But why does right now feel like the right time? Even though Eddie said they’ll see each other again he has that fear that he won’t see him again, he loves all the losers but the way he loves Eddie is different and he can’t let that go.  
“Hey Eddie?” he started as he looked down at Eddie’s hands, the hands with the now ringless finger.  
“Yeah Rich?”  
“I...I love you” he admitted as he looked back up at Eddie. Eddie softly smiled at him.  
“I love you too” Richie felt a lump forming in his throat, this was painful because now he has to brace himself for the rejection he was about to face, the hard rejection.  
“But not the same way right? You don’t love me the way I love you?” He could feel his eyes welling up and he sniffled as Eddie looked at him with confusion.  
“If you knew...if you knew what went on in my head, the way I feel, the way I’ve always felt...you wouldn’t like me” Said Richie, whispering the last part and the look on Eddie’s face changed.

Eddie had a sad look on his face, eyes welling up a little as he shook his head.  
“That’s not true...I’ve always liked you Richie” Said Eddie before shuffling closer to him, Richie felt like his heart was pounding out of his chest and his body was burning up as Eddie’s face got closer to his, those bambi eyes that have his heart doing flips looking up at him.  
“And I like you now...just the way you are” he whispered before he was leaning closer, noses brushing against each other’s before their lips touched. Eddie’s lips were on his...Eddie’s lips were on his?! The kiss was soft and gentle and it is almost everything Richie had ever imagined. Slowly Eddie pulled back, a soft sound as their lips pulled apart before those eyes were looking into his as Richie opened his eyes. 

This time Richie leaned in, hand reaching up to caress Eddie’s cheek as their lips touched again. The kiss was deeper and Richie couldn’t help but snake his other arm around Eddie’s waist and pull him closer, his warm body against his and Eddie’s hand reaching up to Richie’s hand resting on his cheek before they pulled away from the kiss again. Richie leaned up to press a kiss to Eddie’s forehead, soft and lingering as he kept his eyes closed before he moved away, opening his eyes to look at Eddie.

“How long?” Asked Eddie, the first one to break the silence between them as a breathless laugh left Richie. Fuck? How fucking long has he been in love with Eddie?  
“I guess I came to terms with it when I was thirteen but I’ve felt like this...felt these feelings the moment I met you...what about you?” He confessed as Eddie softly smiled.  
“Twelve, I was twelve...but maybe it was earlier I remember feeling those feelings for a long time...I still feel them Richie” he whispered as Richie clutched Eddie’s hand tight, he needed Eddie with him, he couldn’t let him go, not now.

“P-please stay...don’t go” whimpered Richie, voice breaking as a single tear fell down his face.  
“Come back with me, my place his big enough for us...I know you’ll have to deal with Myra but I’ll come with you...please” he felt himself babbling and stuttering over his words as he teared up, it was out in the open now he can’t not see Eddie again. Eddie looked up at him, sadness in his eyes as one of his hands reached up to Richie’s face, his thumb brushing away the single tear that fell down his cheek.  
“Okay” Eddie whispered as Richie looked at him with surprise.  
“Y-you’re coming with me?” He responded as Eddie nodded his head  
“Yeah” he said as he softly smiled and Richie couldn’t stop the huge smile on his face.

Eddie’s lifted his head up a little, closing his eyes as he pressed a kiss to Richie’s head. It took Richie by surprise, someone being so affectionate with him but this wasn’t just anyone, this was Eddie, his first and only love. Richie couldn’t help but close his eyes at the feeling, hand still holding Eddie’s tight and his arm still keeping him close. 

As Eddie pulled away he tucked himself into Richie’s arms, against his body to get comfortable. Richie let go of Eddie’s hand as his other arm wrapped around Eddie’s body in a comforting embrace. This was really it...this was the start of the rest of their lives together.


End file.
